It’s a sad fact that some people build up immense respect among their peers, friends, and community, but without realizing it, they lose it over time. This isn’t something they do intentionally; it happens gradually through subtle personality changes, most of which are negative. To show you what we mean, this article takes a look at 17 common mistakes that are costing you respect from others.
Interrupting Conversations
If you ever find yourself cutting people off when they’re speaking, watch out–this is a fast way to lose their respect. As Psychology Today lays out, it sends a message that you believe your thoughts are more important than theirs, making them feel undervalued and ignored while leading to frustration and strained relationships.
Failing to Follow Through
Promises are easy to make but undeniably hard to keep, although consistently failing to follow through on commitments shows a complete lack of reliability. If you make a habit of this, people will begin to see you as untrustworthy, and over time, this can significantly damage your reputation and reliability in their eyes.
Not Taking Responsibility for Mistakes
Another common mistake that costs you respect on a daily basis is blaming others or making excuses when things go wrong. Your excuses don’t fool anyone, so it’s much wiser to just own up to your mistakes, which shows integrity and courage.
Overcommitting and Under-Delivering
Many people consider saying “yes” to everything to be polite, but in reality, it often leads to overcommitting, and when you can’t deliver what you’ve promised, it reflects poorly on your reliability and time management. It’s better to be honest about your limits than to disappoint others by not meeting expectations–people will respect that.
Being Consistently Late
Chronic lateness signals a lack of respect for others’ time, so why should they respect yours? It’s irrelevant whether it’s meetings, deadlines, or social gatherings; showing up late will make others feel undervalued. Punctuality demonstrates that you appreciate and prioritize other people’s schedules, which helps to maintain their respect.
Neglecting Personal Appearance
While appearance certainly isn’t everything, neglecting basic grooming and attire can affect how others perceive you. People often make quick judgments based on first impressions. So, taking care of your personal appearance shows that you value yourself and the impression you leave on others, which can influence respect.
Speaking Negatively About Others
If you find yourself gossiping or speaking poorly about others behind their backs, don’t be surprised when this damages your credibility. Even if the person you’re talking to agrees, they may start to wonder what you say about them when they’re not around. Maintaining a positive or neutral stance in conversations helps preserve your integrity and respect.
Constantly Complaining
Nobody likes a negative Nancy, as frequently complaining can create a negative atmosphere and push people away. It suggests a lack of resilience and gratitude, which others may find draining. While it’s normal to vent occasionally, consistently focusing on the negative can undermine your influence and respect among peers.
Failing to Listen Actively
If you want people to respect you, it’s very important to remember that listening isn’t just about hearing words; it’s about understanding and responding thoughtfully. When you fail to listen actively, it shows disinterest or self-absorption. People respect those who make an effort to truly engage in conversations, showing empathy and consideration for others’ viewpoints.
Taking Credit for Others’ Work
It should really go without saying that claiming credit for someone else’s achievements or ideas can quickly tarnish your reputation. This behavior is seen as dishonest and opportunistic, eroding trust. At the end of the day, acknowledging others’ contributions is a really basic albeit noble part of being a human, so if you can’t even do that, don’t expect respect back.
Disregarding Boundaries
You should never underestimate the importance of respecting personal and professional boundaries. Overstepping can make others uncomfortable and lead to a loss of respect, including invading personal space, over-communicating outside work hours, or pushing people into uncomfortable situations. Maintaining boundaries shows consideration and respect for others’ limits, yielding you respect in return.
Not Being Open to Feedback
When you shut down or react defensively to feedback, this suggests arrogance or a lack of willingness to grow. Being open to constructive criticism shows humility and a commitment to improvement, and people respect those who are willing to listen and make changes rather than those who are closed off to suggestions.
Being Inconsistent
Inconsistent behavior, such as frequent mood swings or unpredictable reactions, can confuse and frustrate those around you. Consistency builds trust, as people know what to expect from you. Meanwhile, erratic actions can make others wary of relying on you, which diminishes respect over time.
Overusing Your Phone During Interactions
These days, it’s very important to remember to not constantly check your phone during conversations, which can make others feel unimportant. It suggests that your attention is elsewhere, which will, understandably, be perceived as rude. Give your full attention to those you’re with, even for brief interactions, and this will demonstrate respect, which will no doubt be reciprocated.
Not Acknowledging Others
When you fail to acknowledge the efforts and achievements of others, this comes off as dismissive. People appreciate recognition, even for small things, so try to acknowledge others’ contributions whenever possible, showing that you value their input. In return, they will undoubtedly return the favor.
Talking Over Others
Another commonsensical point on this list is that talking over others, especially in group settings, can make you seem disrespectful. It conveys that you prioritize your voice above everyone else’s, which isn’t fair at all. Allowing others to speak without interruption shows that you value their opinions and are willing to share the conversation respectfully.
Being Dishonest
Finally, perhaps the most common, albeit damaging, mistake when it comes to respect is being dishonest. Even small lies can damage your credibility, as dishonesty in any situation invariably leads to a loss of trust that’s hard to rebuild. Being truthful, even when it’s uncomfortable, shows that you value integrity, so never forget that.