Sometimes, our drive for approval can overshadow our true desires, leading us away from what genuinely fulfills us. This isn’t good, and it’s very important to recognize when this happens so you can realign with your authentic self. So, here are some clues that you might be chasing approval rather than your real passions.
Constantly Seeking Validation
If you find that you need frequent validation from others, this can indicate that your actions are more about pleasing them than pursuing your true interests. When your decisions are heavily influenced by what others think, it’s easy to lose sight of what genuinely makes you happy and fulfilled. To tackle this, Psych Central recommends, “Try replacing your validation-seeking behaviors with self-soothing methods, such as mindfulness meditation and yoga.”
Avoiding Disapproval at All Costs
You might also find yourself going out of your way to avoid any form of disapproval; if so, watch out because this is another sign that you might be prioritizing others’ opinions over your own passions. Such avoidance can lead to compromises that leave you feeling disconnected from your true self and your own aspirations, so just accept any disapproval as constructive criticism and set yourself free.
Changing Your Goals to Fit In
It’s never a good idea to alter your ambitions or interests to align with what’s popular or accepted by those around you, as this suggests that approval is driving your choices. It can prevent you from exploring what truly excites you, which will keep you from staying true to your goals.
Feeling Insecure About Your Choices
Second-guessing your decisions or feeling uneasy about your path suggests that your choices are rooted in the need for external validation. When your confidence suddenly dissipates just because of others’ opinions, it’s a clue that approval is overshadowing your own passions and sense of purpose. Remember: at the end of the day, your choices are your choices only.
Prioritizing Image Over Substance
These days, it’s all too common for people to focus too heavily on how things look rather than their substance, especially when it comes to our physical appearances. If this sounds familiar, it indicates that you’re chasing approval instead of your passions. This is because it leads you to curate an image that appeals to others but doesn’t reflect your true self, which isn’t how things should be at all.
Avoiding Risks That Could Lead to Failure
It’s natural to try and steer clear of risks in life, as taking such gambles might result in failure. However, you shouldn’t take failure so seriously; sure, avoiding it can keep you in a safe zone, but this will eventually become unsatisfying, preventing you from growing and exploring big opportunities. So, accept failure in your life because it’s the only path to eventual success.
Frequently Changing Your Mind
Ever find that you’re constantly shifting your focus or changing your mind to match others’? If so, this can be a sign of approval-seeking, and such inconsistency probably reflects a lack of alignment with your own desires. Instead, try grounding your choices in what truly matters so that you can provide yourself with more direction and stability.
Feeling Burned Out but Pushing Through
If you ever feel burnt out, persisting in activities that continue to leave you feeling drained is a terrible idea, especially if you’re doing so just to maintain approval. In fact, it indicates misalignment with your true interests, so it might be wise to start reassessing your commitments to help you reconnect with what energizes and excites you.
Overcommitting to Please Others
Another clue that you’re chasing approval instead of your true passions is if you’re saying yes to everything in an effort to please those around you. This will spread you too thin over time, leaving little room for your own passions. It’s very important that you learn to set boundaries, allowing you to focus on what truly fulfills you, such as your dreams.
Measuring Success by Others’ Standards
Do you tend to judge your achievements based on external standards rather than personal satisfaction? If so, that’s a red flag for approval-seeking behavior. This approach will leave you feeling unfulfilled, even when you meet those standards, as they’re not your own goals. Instead, you need to define success on your own terms, and this will help you to keep your goals aligned with your true passions.
Feeling Lost Without Praise
There’s no denying that it’s nice to receive praise, but relying on it to feel good about your progress can suggest that you’re chasing external validation in an unhealthy manner. The absence of praise might leave you feeling unsure or demotivated, which indicates that approval, rather than passion, is guiding your actions.
Letting Fear of Criticism Hold You Back
In contrast to praise, no one likes to be criticized, but allowing the fear of criticism to dictate your actions can keep you from pursuing what you truly love. This fear often leads to playing it safe and avoiding paths that might be more fulfilling but less understood by others. So, try to learn to embrace criticism as part of your personal growth–you’ll be surprised at how much this simple change of perspective liberates you.
Comparing Yourself Constantly
Nowadays, many people obsess over comparing their lives to those of other people, usually on social media. This isn’t the right path at all, as it involves focusing too heavily on external approval. Ultimately, it’s a habit that detracts from your own journey and can obscure what truly matters to you, so just focus on your unique path and progress, and if other people like it, that’s a bonus.
Feeling Unsatisfied Despite Success
Even if you’re achieving goals and milestones, if they leave you feeling empty or unfulfilled, that’s a clear signal that those goals were more about meeting others’ expectations than your own. This dissatisfaction suggests that approval was the primary motivator, so it’s time to realign your efforts with what genuinely excites you.
Avoiding Authentic Expression
Do you tend towards hiding parts of yourself or downplaying your true interests to fit in? If so, this is an obvious clue that you’re chasing approval. Authentic expression might feel risky, but it’s essential for living in alignment with your passions. Embracing who you are, even when it diverges from the norm, is the only way to give yourself true fulfillment.
Struggling to Make Decisions Independently
A final clue that you’re prioritizing approval over your passions and aspirations is if you have difficulty making decisions without seeking others’ input or approval. This reliance on external opinions can lead to choices that don’t truly reflect what you want. Don’t forget to prioritize trusting your own instincts and take ownership of your decisions, and you’ll soon be empowered to follow your true path once again.