Everyone wants to be there for their friends when times get tough, but this is easier said than done. Sometimes, our friends put on a brave face when they’re struggling, making it tough for us to know when they need help. So, to ensure you’re there for your friends when they need you, here are some silent signs that they’re going through something tough.
Frequent Plan Cancellations
If your friend once enjoyed spending time with you, yet they’ve started to cancel plans more often, Fraser.org points out that it could signal that they’re feeling overwhelmed with life. It’s easy to brush off as being busy, and they may even use that as an excuse. However, repeated cancellations might mean they’re struggling with anxiety, fatigue, or a lack of motivation to socialize, so why not reach out to them to see how they’re doing?
Changes in Sleep Patterns
Noticeable changes in sleep, like insomnia or excessive sleeping, can be a red flag. Therefore, if your friend keeps mentioning sleepless nights or seems unusually sluggish, that might be due to more than just a busy schedule. Sleep issues are often linked to stress, anxiety, or other mental health concerns and shouldn’t be ignored.
Disengagement in Conversations
A friend who seems mentally checked out during conversations or doesn’t engage like they used to could be dealing with personal issues. Appearing distracted, giving short responses, or showing disinterest in things once enjoyed can indicate internal struggles that aren’t being openly shared.
Frequent Mood Swings
Another silent sign that your friend is struggling is regular mood swings or emotional reactions that seem out of character, both of which could indicate underlying issues. Irritability, sudden sadness, or unexpected bursts of anger can surface when someone is under significant stress. So, it’s important to notice these shifts to help you understand when something more serious might be going on.
Neglecting Personal Appearance
Pay attention if a friend starts neglecting their personal appearance or hygiene. Wearing the same clothes repeatedly, not grooming, or generally looking disheveled can be signs they’re finding it hard to keep up with daily routines. This change in self-care often points to deeper emotional struggles, so it certainly shouldn’t be brushed off as them being “sloppy.”
Changes in Eating Habits
It’s common for a shift in eating habits, such as overeating, loss of appetite, or eating only comfort foods, to accompany emotional distress. These changes might seem minor, but they can reflect attempts to cope with underlying stress or sadness. If you recognize these patterns in your friend, it might provide a glimpse into the obstacles that they’re facing.
Increased Use of Substances
Sadly, many people turn to alcohol, drugs, or other substances as a coping mechanism for dealing with stress or emotional pain. It’s not always obvious, but noticing an uptick in these behaviors, especially in situations where they normally wouldn’t indulge, could indicate deeper issues.
Expressing Negative Self-Talk
Comments that reflect negative self-talk or self-doubt, even in a joking manner, can be telling, so don’t ignore them if your friend keeps using them. Phrases like “I’m just not good enough” or “I always mess things up” might seem offhand but can reveal a pattern of critical inner dialogue. These remarks often hint at struggles with self-esteem, so try to boost their confidence.
Loss of Interest in Hobbies
A sudden lack of interest in hobbies or activities that used to bring joy can be a silent sign of suffering. For example, if your friend stops attending their usual classes, skips the gym, or abandons creative pursuits, it might be a signal that they’re battling feelings of apathy or depression. Why not encourage them to get involved in their hobbies again, perhaps offering to join in?
Increased Sensitivity or Irritability
Increased sensitivity to criticism or irritability over small things can indicate underlying stress. If your friend reacts defensively or gets upset more easily than before, it could be a reflection of what’s going on internally. Stress often heightens emotional responses, making everyday interactions feel overwhelming.
Frequently Complaining of Physical Ailments
Believe it or not, frequent headaches, stomach issues, or other physical ailments might not just be about physical health; stress and anxiety can manifest as physical symptoms, making it easy to overlook their true cause. Persistent health complaints can be a sign that your friend is under emotional strain, so mention this to them to see if something is weighing on their mind.
Isolation from Close Friends
It should go without saying that if someone starts to pull away from their closest friends, it’s a sign that they’re struggling. Isolation can be a coping mechanism, whether due to not wanting to burden others or simply lacking the energy to connect. Thankfully, simply checking in when someone pulls back can make a big difference.
Difficulty Focusing or Making Decisions
If you notice your friend is struggling to focus, make decisions, or keep track of things, this can point to underlying stress or anxiety. Perhaps they were once organized but have now started to miss deadlines, forget important details, or generally seem scattered; either way, it could be more than just a busy schedule.
Lack of Enthusiasm for the Future
A friend who no longer talks about future plans or seems uninterested in upcoming events might be struggling to find motivation or hope. This lack of enthusiasm can signal that they’re feeling stuck or uncertain. It’s a quiet sign that things might not be going well internally.
Constantly Feeling Overwhelmed
Regularly expressing that they feel overwhelmed, even by small tasks, is a sign that something deeper is going on with your mate. Feeling perpetually behind or unable to cope can point to burnout, stress, or mental health issues. Try to offer your support and understanding, and this will no doubt help ease some of their burden.
Changes in Communication Patterns
When you notice a shift in how your friend communicates, the tone of their messages, or how often they chat with you, this can be revealing. Long gaps in responses, short or vague replies, or a sudden stop in communication might indicate that they’re not in a good place. Checking in gently can help open a line of support.
Avoiding Eye Contact
Finally, not many people realize that avoiding eye contact during conversations or looking away frequently might be a subtle indication of discomfort or shame. This can happen when someone is struggling with feelings they aren’t ready to share; most commonly, these feelings concern feeling vulnerable, anxious, or unsure about opening up.