In any competition, arrogance in victory can be off-putting, but dealing with a sore loser is often even more frustrating. When someone can’t handle losing gracefully, it can quickly ruin the fun for everyone involved. Here are 18 signs that someone might be a sore loser.
Holding Grudges
It’s very common for sore losers to hold grudges, and Verywell Mind explains why this is: “This reaction is particularly common when you think someone has done something intentionally, callously, or thoughtlessly to hurt you.” This is obviously nonsense, as just because you lost doesn’t mean that your opponents were intentionally trying to hurt you, but regardless, they’ll still hold the grudge.
Obsession with Rematch or Revenge
A sore loser can often be one of those people who demands a rematch or pleads for just one more game. They struggle to deal with a loss and think if they get one more chance and win, then they will claim superiority and everything will be good.
Refusal to Acknowledge the Winner
Sometimes a sore loser won’t acknowledge the winner, as they’re struggling to comprehend that they’ve lost. They may often play down the competition by acting like it wasn’t important but most likely, if they had won, it would’ve been of massive significance.
Excuses
As mentioned by Headspace, “Psychologists place excuse-making in the ‘self-handicapping’ category—that is, it’s a behavior we express that hurts our own performance and motivation.” This telltale sign of being a sore loser is actually holding them back and affecting their chances of being a future winner.
Anger and Aggression
When a person displays anger or aggression after a competition, it’s clear to all that they’re a sore loser. It’s an obvious sign that they haven’t accepted defeat gracefully. Often, they will direct their anger at someone else, such as a manager or teammate, which is due to their lack of accountability.
Withdrawal and Isolation
After a defeat, a sore loser may withdraw themselves from social events such as team debriefs. This is usually due to them dealing with their own thoughts and getting their head around the loss they’ve just suffered. Although there may be more direct ways to show you’re a sore loser, isolation is still a clear sign.
Overemphasis on Winning
When someone makes it all about winning after a competition, it can be a sign they are a sore loser. They can often show complete disinterest in the activity when they’re not winning, or even change the rules in favor of themselves coming in first.
Poor Sportsmanship
Most people have crossed paths with someone who has shown poor sportsmanship at some point in their lives. It’s an ugly quality that quickly highlights their lack of ability to deal with defeat graciously. They will often refuse to shake hands with the winner or try to belittle their competitors.
Dwelling on the Loss
Reflecting on a loss to understand where it went wrong and how to improve for the future is a good habit. However, when someone dwells on their defeat, it becomes more of a negative trait. A sore loser can often keep bringing up the loss in unrelated conversations or allow the loss to affect their mood.
Unwillingness to Learn from the Experience
Sore losers often struggle to reflect on a defeat and learn from the experience. They can dismiss any form of feedback or constructive criticism. They’ll refuse to acknowledge any personal mistake made on their behalf. Their lack of accountability most likely has a negative impact on their future performances.
Denial of Reality
One of the clearest signs that someone is a sore loser is when they start to blame the competition for being rigged or even state that they actually won. They often reject any argument based on facts that show they lost. This is mainly because they don’t want to comprehend this outcome.
Sabotaging Future Games
Sore losers have been known to purposely underperform in future competitions. This can have a negative impact on a wide range of people when playing team sports and it’s also a selfish act. A sore loser sees this as a protest, but actually, they are just negatively affecting their own chances of winning.
Overly Critical of Others
Sore losers can sometimes be overly critical of others. This includes placing the blame on team members. Sore losers are very competitive, and they struggle with accepting their own actions, especially if they’ve done something that was detrimental to their winning.
Excessive Self-Blame
Sore losers can have a detrimental effect on themselves. According to Psychology Today, self-blame can be one of the most toxic forms of emotional abuse. Being overly critical can mean they take it too personally and are not able to reflect on the positives that may have been present in the competition.
Loss of Interest in the Game
A loss can affect a sore loser so badly that they can lose complete interest in the game. Some can quit the game or competition, which seems extreme but this is how hard it is for them to accept defeat; they want to avoid going through those emotions again.
Projecting Insecurities
Losing is tough for sore losers but sometimes they can make the situation worse by projecting their frustrations and insecurities on others. As Bright Side writes, projecting insecurities on your loved ones can end up hurting them or making them feel guilty without even knowing.
Manipulating Rules or Conditions
Sore losers can sometimes highlight the reason they’re losing and try to change the rules for future games. They do this because they feel they’re taking away their weakness, which should then bring them success in future competitions. You also see professional sports players attempt to manipulate referees to make a decision in their favor.
Avoidance of Competitive Situations
A person who has reflected and is aware they’re a sore loser will often avoid any kind of competition. Avoiding the risk of losing ensures they won’t feel the negative emotions involved, and they won’t embarrass themselves publicly as others won’t witness them being a sore loser.