Emotional overwhelm often goes unnoticed, especially in men who may feel pressure to appear strong and composed. These silent struggles can take many forms, often masked by daily life, so we’ve listed some signs to look out for—both in yourself, and in other men—that may indicate an emotional struggle.
Straying Away from Social Events
When someone starts skipping out on social gatherings or dodging plans with friends, it’s often easy to assume they’re just busy or not in the mood, but when this avoidance becomes a habit, it could signal something deeper. Being around people takes energy—especially when someone is carrying emotional weight they don’t feel ready to share.
Getting Grumpy Over Little Things
Feelings that are bottled up have a way of sneaking out in unexpected ways, and irritability is a common one. They might not even realise they’re doing it, but these moments can be signs that they’re dealing with more stress or sadness than they’re letting on.
Struggling to Stay Focused
Have you ever noticed someone zoning out mid-conversation or repeatedly asking you to repeat yourself? It’s frustrating, but for them, it could be a sign that their mind is preoccupied with stress or worry, as emotional overwhelm often clouds our ability to focus because the brain is busy trying to process the load it’s carrying.
Complaining About Aches and Pains
When someone starts mentioning regular headaches, backaches, or stomach problems but brushes them off as “just one of those things,” it might be worth digging a little deeper. Stress often takes a toll on the body, even if they don’t realise the connection.
Turning to Booze or Other Vices
Alcohol, cigarettes, or other substances can offer a temporary escape from whatever feels too heavy to handle, but they’re a short-term fix, and when these habits ramp up, they’re often a sign of trying to numb something deeper. The issue is that while these crutches might dull the pain in the moment, they often add to it in the long run.
Losing Passion for What They Love
When someone suddenly stops doing the things they used to love—whether it’s playing football, tinkering with their car, or even gaming—it’s rarely just about being bored. Often, it’s a sign that they’re so emotionally drained they don’t have the energy or excitement for things that used to bring them joy.
Tossing and Turning All Night
Stress and anxiety can make it hard to relax enough to fall asleep, or they might find themselves lying awake, replaying worries over and over. On the other hand, sleeping too much can be a way to escape from the day altogether; either way, these changes in sleep aren’t random—they’re the body’s response to overload.
Being Extra Forgetful or Clumsy
Have you started misplacing your phone, forgetting appointments, or tripping over your own feet more often than usual, or know someone who has? These moments can point to something deeper, thanks to stress clogging up mental bandwidth, leaving less room for coordination.
Dodging Hard Conversations
We all avoid tough talks now and then, but if someone consistently skirts serious discussions or changes the subject when emotions come up, it might mean they’re overwhelmed. Opening up about how they’re feeling can seem scary, especially if they’re not used to being vulnerable, and they might worry about how others will react.
Throwing Themselves Into Work
When work becomes the centre of someone’s universe, it’s not always because they’re passionate about their job, because sometimes, it’s a way to avoid everything else. Work can be predictable and give a sense of control when life feels chaotic, but this kind of hyper-focus can also be a red flag that they’re using busyness as a way to distract themselves.
Eating Way More or Way Less
Have you noticed someone picking at their food or, on the flip side, suddenly eating nonstop? Changes in eating habits are often a reflection of emotional struggles, too, and some people lose their appetite when they’re stressed or sad because it’s hard to prioritise meals when their mind is elsewhere.
Feeling All Over the Place
One minute they’re upbeat, the next they’re snapping, and then they’re quiet and withdrawn—it can be hard to keep up, but these mood swings aren’t just random, because they’re often a sign of someone trying to keep it all together while their emotions fight to break through. The ups and downs can be exhausting for both them and those around them, but they’re a signal that their inner balance is out of whack.
Running Out of Patience
Patience requires emotional reserves, as we know, and when someone’s running on empty, even minor annoyances can feel overwhelming. It’s not about the traffic or the slow Wi-Fi—it’s about the weight of everything they’re already carrying.
Letting Themselves Go
If you notice that someone who usually takes care of their appearance suddenly stops putting in the effort, or is wearing the same clothes repeatedly, skipping haircuts, or looking generally dishevelled, it’s often a sign they’re struggling. Grooming might seem unimportant to them when they’re emotionally overwhelmed, and even small acts of self-care can feel like a mountain to climb.
Overthinking
Because they might be overthinking everything due to being afraid of making mistakes or feeling like they’re letting people down, they might be constantly second-guessing their words. This can show that someone is battling with anxiety or low self-esteem, doubting their every move.
Feeling Restless and Fidgety
Pacing the room, fiddling with objects, or constantly needing to stay busy can be signs of inner turmoil, too, because restlessness is often a physical manifestation of emotional unease. It’s a way to channel nervous energy when their mind is racing, and it’s like their body is trying to outrun certain feelings.
Carrying Around Too Much Guilt
Feeling guilty is one thing, but when someone seems weighed down by it—apologising for things they didn’t cause or constantly blaming themselves—it’s a sign of deeper emotional struggles. This excessive guilt often comes from low self-worth or feeling like they’re failing, even when they’re not.
Pulling Away from Family and Friends
Cancelling plans with a colleague or a casual acquaintance is one thing, yet when someone starts cancelling plans with close loved ones they usually see all the time, or become hard to reach, it’s often about more than just being busy. They might feel like they don’t have the energy to connect right now.
Talking About Feeling Empty
On a final note, a man who might be emotionally overwhelmed might vocalise feeling more empty than anything. They might not have the words to explain what they’re going through, but this sense of emptiness often reflects something deeper about the way they’re feeling right now, leaving them disconnected.