First impressions are everything, and often, it’s the little things strangers do that decide whether we warm to them or find them off-putting. Whether it’s body language or how they treat others, these moments can shape relationships in seconds. In this post, we explore the behaviours that make or break instant connections.
Giving a Genuine Smile
A warm, genuine smile has the power to make someone feel welcome without a single word being spoken, as it’s considered the universal sign of kindness, signalling that you’re open and approachable. On the flip side, a forced or absent smile can feel awkward or cold, leaving you second-guessing how the interaction will go.
Interrupting Conversations
Few things are as frustrating as being cut off mid-sentence. It feels like the other person values their words more than yours or isn’t really listening at all, and interrupting not only disrupts the flow of a conversation but also sends a clear signal that they’re impatient or self-centred.
The Right Level of Eye Contact
There’s something disarming about someone who makes just the right amount of eye contact, and it shows confidence, attentiveness, and a genuine interest in the interaction.
A steady gaze, paired with occasional glances away, helps conversations feel natural and engaging, but balance is key, because too little eye contact can feel awkward.
Being Polite to Service Staff
You can tell a lot about a person by the way they treat waiters, baristas, or cashiers, like whether they say “please” and “thank you.” It’s one thing to be charming with friends or colleagues, but it’s another to extend that same kindness to strangers in service roles.
Oversharing Personal Information
There’s a fine line between being open and being too much, too soon, so when a stranger starts pouring out their deepest secrets or personal dramas moments after meeting you, it can feel overwhelming and even a bit awkward. It’s natural to want to connect, but connection takes time and trust.
A Firm Handshake
The right handshake is all about balance—it’s a simple, no-fuss way to say, “I’m glad to meet you,” and it’s amazing how such a small physical gesture can set the tone for the entire interaction.
A handshake might seem like a tiny detail, but it carries a surprising amount of weight in first impressions, with a firm grip conveying confidence.
Talking About Themselves Too Much
Nothing drains the life out of a conversation faster than someone who makes it all about themselves, like a stranger spending the entire time bragging about their accomplishments, recounting endless anecdotes, or turning every topic back to them—it can feel exhausting. A good conversation is a two-way street where both people feel seen and heard.
Genuine Compliments are Given
When someone gives a compliment without expecting anything in return, it feels uplifting, compared to compliments that feel over-the-top or insincere, which can have the opposite effect. A sincere compliment can brighten someone’s day in an instant, especially when you know they’re not giving it to be manipulative.
Respect for Personal Space
Standing too close or being overly touchy can feel invasive, especially with someone you’ve just met, as we all have an invisible bubble around us. Respecting that space is crucial when meeting someone new, while on the other hand, keeping a considerate distance shows you’re mindful of their boundaries.
Laughing at the Right Moments
Laughter is one of the quickest ways to break the ice and build a sense of connection. When someone laughs at the right moments in a conversation, it shows they’re engaged, and it’s a great way to feel closer to someone. Humour should uplift, not alienate, so laughing at the wrong time can quickly alienate, too.
Always Arriving on Time
It’s not about being rigid or overly formal—it’s about setting the tone for a positive interaction. Whether it’s a casual coffee or a formal meeting, punctuality says a lot about someone’s values because when someone shows up promptly, it signals reliability and consideration, which are both traits that instantly make them more likeable.
Talking Loudly in Public
There’s something incredibly off-putting about people who seem oblivious to how loudly they’re talking in a public space. Being mindful of your volume shows awareness and consideration for others, while a calm, measured tone of voice can make someone seem instantly more approachable.
Help is Offered Without Hesitation
Most of us would say tha small acts of kindness from strangers are what helps the world be a better place—and it makes it easier to like them as well—like holding a door open or helping someone carry a heavy bag.
Kindness costs nothing, but it leaves a lasting impression, and especially if you choose not to be kind, it’s likely the other person will remember.
Checking Their Phone Constantly
Few things are as discouraging as trying to have a conversation with someone who keeps glancing at their phone; putting the phone away and engaging fully in the moment is a simple way to show respect. It’s about what it represents—being fully present and valuing the interaction.
Too Many Opinions
Being overly forceful with your views can feel like you’re putting up a wall instead of building a bridge, even though sharing your thoughts and beliefs is a natural part of the conversation. Dominating the discussion with strong opinions can come across as overbearing, especially when you’re talking to someone who barely knows you.
Showing Gratitude
When you say “thank you,” it might seem like a small thing, but it carries a lot of weight. Gratitude shows that you value the effort or kindness of others, no matter how small, which means that when someone neglects to say thank you, it can come across as entitled and negative.
Inclusive Gestures
Those who go out of their way to ensure everyone is involved tend to leave a lasting impression of inclusivity, making sure to put focus on the small ways we make others feel they belong. Being excluded, even unintentionally, can be an instant mood killer, making you feel like an outsider.
Having an Unkempt Appearance
While appearances aren’t everything, they do send a message about how much effort someone puts into presenting themselves, and a well-kept appearance shows respect for yourself and for those you meet. Taking a little time to appear neat and put together can make a world of difference in how others perceive you.